Hidden compartments in houses take all shapes and forms: electrical outlets, hollow books, fake CDs, false cabinet fronts. But what about the heating system?
Any dope dealer or jewel thief will tell you that it’s easy enough to unscrew the heating register (grille) and stow drugs or diamonds in the metal ductwork. You can improve on this by taping the stash to the top of the duct or even using magnets.
Anybody who has ever watched the TV series Breaking Bad knows that Walter White, for a period, tapes his cash to the inside of the heating register.
But what about creating a dedicated HVAC compartment?
Hidden Safes, Inc. offers an HVAC vent hiding compartment, and they say that it
…opens like a drawbridge revealing the Secret compartment. The air vent secret compartment comes completely assembled with 2 removable shelves, and 4 fasteners. Simply cut a hole in the drywall or paneling using a razor knife or hacksaw blade and put 4 screws in and you’re finished!
Flaws With This System
Nice idea. But other than the high cost of $259.95 + $15 shipping, I see a few flaws:
- Is this supposed to be an HVAC return? A return is a large vent that sucks room air back into the system, so that it can be recirculated. Thus…
- If the heat or AC is running, any perceptive thief or lawman will notice that no air is being pulled into vent.
- If it’s not a return, it’s a register. Except registers are located in floors or ceilings. That’s because ducts cannot run through walls.
- This product requires that you cut space for an entirely new vent. While it’s unlikely that anyone will be counting air vents in your rooms, why not try to be as exact about this as possible?
Why not design a wall safe vent that fits into the actual HVAC system (rather than just a dummy vent) and which allows for air bypass? You wouldn’t be able to get the same volume as with the other vents, but it might be enough to fool someone.
In other words, why not just tape your contraband to the inside of the air return–Walter White-style?
